day ripper.....

...start your day wif a smile....I know.

...the wasted day is a day wif'out a laugh....I know.

...when you smile to the world....it'll smile back to you....I know.

...I know those creepy stuff they wrote on their 'How-to-live-your-life' book. 

A real crime........

it is stealing one's heart. It's a pity we can't call the police. we have lost our most valueable possession, still, no body can get arrested.

He said he did. He said it was impossible. the mass of contradictions has been frustrating both parties. the third, was just a.....hmmm....cant find the word for it.

Jesus loves me in  a way I eventually will understand. not now. reading the 'book' have caused me to understand that His timing is indeed in time. they said that He will amaze me. I'm looking forward to it.

trying to change HUAAAAA to HUAHAHAHAHAHA

love will keep us alive....eagle.

it's been a long slow collision...

I'm a pitbull n you're a dog

Baby you fault in a clear condition...

but you're handsome in the fog

.....blinded mode on...he stated the 'it' statement yesterday...out of the blue...of Indonesia...

Eh......

Easter celebration. Makan mie ayam....yuuukkk. However, this new shirt cheers me up a lil'bit. It's been a week lho...since I was deserted. Hak hak hak...

Planning on vacation with a budget tightens itself. D@mn....

But, what's been planned, shuld be done.

I have given up my hair, for I have given my vow.

i hate weekends..............

.....sumpe lho.

They say...I don't deserve it....

My two friends, who have made me their fag hag, told me that I didn't deserve to be treated this way. I should get a better serve. He (God knows who) had treated me well. Through the hide n seek, blood and tears (literally), those experiences I wont forget. They're my heaven and hell. 

Did I lose things? I surely wont say no. But Ive gained enough in return. I won't lie for  He whose resurrection is celebrated knows, I would have stayed with my decision had I been given 2nd chance.

I know that my trespasses will be forgiven as I forgive those who trespass against me. So...by no means of taking it for granted, but I know IT WILL BE WORTHY. 

My oh my....I have the greatest faith toward goodness.

it's been a while....

ya of course....we have Easter stuff goin' on. 

Waiting for nothing kata Andre...yaw dah...yang penting bisa have fun while waiting kan jadi sumthing toh?

Alrite....it's not that I can't but I won't. What would you do if you were in my shoes? Can't you see? It's impossible to choose. I do have limits. He's the limit.

i got PUNKED

by myself......how come? I'm biting more than I can chew. force my *ss not to choke. See, I know words are hazzardeous. Just didn't know that it will come to this point, where the hazzards are actually eating me alive. But hey, that's what I'm asking to J. So if I get whatever I'm facing, I know that He has measured it. I believe that He knows when I bluff and when I mean it. Though I'm biting more tha I can chew, He WON'T let me choke. how? I have no idea. But hey, we're talking about the One who creates Gates and Einstein and Da Vinci...so He knows how. there is no such thing as we call otherwise in His dictionary.

so.....let's wait.

It's easier to be honest

when in denial things tend to be very violent to me. so let's be honest. I've written that if you haven't been to hell, heaven might not be that interesting. it's true. one can appreciate good 'luck' without having any bad 'lucks' beforehand. However, one whose life is filled with the 'unfortunates', will have greater appreciation toward the blessings. 

Options exist.

my good opinion, don't dodge the 'unfortunates'. Instead, have them dealt well.

If the 'unfortunates' re-appear, It is as if we can always say, is that all you've got? I'll take your best shot. because they've been there before. Numb theory is bullsh#t. the 'unfortunates' hurt. Note that I use present tense for permanent state. We will never be numb...but we'll have our lessons learnt. Then we have the advantage of having a preparation.

MY RIGHT HAND HURTS.....

I did some violence......yesterday

the M word

Marriage. Have no idea it will be such a long exhale...............hihihihi........

Making kebaya.....that's fun. Listing people. Being busy. bubuhohohoho.....love it.

I have a great time today, excluding those remedialists (I invented the word). But, it's such a relieve.

Dancing. Partying.Messing around. Surfing. Yeah. Back on track.

DELUSION..

When I texted 'we are delusional' he agreed. 'we have been pretending to be loved' he had no hesitation toward it. The conclusion we made was, we were delusional. the 'were' might not be true in my case, for it reamains 'am'. 

As hard as it sounds, when reality does bite. What could we possibly do? I'd say bite back twice harder. Plus a spa. 

Hei dudey, my good opinion about crying: useless if there are things we can do to fix things; useful if there are nothing left for us to do.

Let's cry.

HOME SWEET HOME....

Plan to go home. Yeah.....skipping a day for my ol' folks. Preparing a vote.

They say I look like Farrah Quinn. I noticed her early this morning in Sunday POst. We might. 

Talking to a newly-heart-broken friend. Let's take the bright side Milky, it can only break once. Repetitions dont count. You and l have lived through it, haven't we? so next time we're facing the almost-the-same-feeling-of an old brand new heart-break, we know what to do. 

Smile like you mean it.......

Im quite entertained today. Thinking of tmrw makes me sad and grateful at the same time. Good money day today...hihihihihihi....money is indeed the most helpful instrument in making things up.

Howeeeeevvvver, it's been a while since I accepted my latest state. The last few days I was in denial. Bad ones, keep on repeating the person that shall not be mentioned all over. As for the sake of honesty, I still cannot accept it fully, but 80% I've let go. =)

Jeezzz, I want my peace back.

New project....fairytale.....

...sitting in the clroom wasted and wounded...halah....ga ding. a great idea pop up while watching the 12s doing their writing. I'm making my life a fairy tale! however, since it was a grown-up stuff it should be rated.....hmhmhmhmhm.....

Will I survive?

At first I was afraid, I was petrified, I kept thinking I could never live without you by my side....

He, whose name shall not be mentioned, has left me with a shoot of dignity in me. The shoot shall grow, it takes time I know, but let me vow, it's root wont be shallow.

Beh..............It doesn't kill me. It shall never will. You're 1 in a million, however, since we have BILLION...s, finding a proper subtitute is just a matter of time....

wE were born alone ... so trust no one....

How pathetic that sounds to you? 

See my good opinion is, have a girlfriend. You can google it, that having a girlfriend *doesn't matter what sex you are, it isn't invloving sumthin' sexual* is actually the best way to seek for a comfort. They listen, they argue, the judge, they b*t@h, but eventually they understand. And the best thing is that.....they stay.

=)

They say I'm straight and he's not..............

Blah.......I'm straight...am I? do I look like Im having options to choose? neither does he. It's not me nor him, it's the world. We're living in a straight world. We see the line, we follow it but have no idea where it end or what's there waiting for us. You might feel as if you're turning, but you're not. Bend over, you'll see it clearer. People, you're not 'straighter' than him....Im not. Don't judge, for you'll be judge. I've learnt it the hardest way possible for me. 

I got confused. What does exactly It want from us? Being straight is as hard as what they call the otherwise. Don't pretend to choose, it'll hurt you. For at the end, you know, you are customized already.

Let go. The pain-theory is better than the numb-theory. Enjoy!

I am BT

today is the .......th day of the misery-vs-mistery-full days. I hate waiting. I wouldn't do this to others. Make them wait. Unless...............a really worthy stuff is coming otw. But still =( , though they say patience is indeed a virtue. 

Best thing being a human.............we know exactly nothing.

tp lumayan lah ntn World Trade Center ma anak2 IPA. walo ga slese. KOreksian remains....ngngngng.....T-T my dearests A4.....please fix your scores, you're giving me a headache. What is wrong with building a chemistry with Chemistry? Prepare your physical endurance to face Physics. And biologically, you should be able to wrap up Biology. WHY?

hik hik hik.....hohoooohoooo

juz curious what it takes to be a joker.....kan enak.....being 'not' serious. Im dumped *D@&n*. Ive forgotten to be single n not available. Im trying hard to get real and memorize it. And of course.............ask myself......................WHY so SERIOUS? )

training.....murid libur.....padahal......

 
I love my manicured nails......why shuld I looooooooooooooooooooose them? *sigh*